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Many parents, especially first-time ones, run to parenting books for guidance on how to care for their newborn babies. Of course, authors of parenting books are eager to lay out the physical as well as social needs of babies and children. However, one aspect that is, up to this day, largely overlooked in parenting books are a child’s emotional needs. Sure, they tackle emotional quotient as being more important than a child’s IQ, but do you know that parents play the largest role in shaping their child’s EQ?
How do parents meet a child’s emotional needs? After all, aren’t they so young that they need to be guided to behave properly and not throw temper tantrums?
Herein lies the very subtle deception. Young children typically do not have the capacity to tell right and wrong, and expecting them to behave based on standards that adults have set over the generations in their specific culture is not only unrealistic, it also sets an unnecessary pressure on the child. Have you seen parents who scold their young kids for spilling a cup of juice on the carpet? Parents can rave and rave about how stupid the child was for spilling, or sometimes, for not obeying the rule of no drinks in the living room, when in fact the child is obviously immature, not rebellious. This has a scathing effect on a child, especially when done often. And indeed, parents who have the weakness of yelling at their child for every little misdeed, intentional or not, tend to succumb to that weakness more and more.
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